It’s true. That line is not clickbait.
One of the core aspects of my teaching is about making space in order to receive.
So what does that mean exactly?
Let me paint a picture.
You have an empty cup, you fill it with coffee right to the brim.
You can’t pick the cup up without spilling that black liquid magic all over the place. What this also means is that there is no room for your favourite companion like milk, or Baileys Irish Cream (don’t worry I got you.. I was into that too a while back, but I digress)
So what do you do? Well, you either dump a little coffee out, or you suck some of that full bodied magic back, throw your head back and give a holla, eyes wide, and then you add the extra goodness you desire. Next time, you probably leave a little room.
Simple enough right?
In the rest of your life areas though, have you left a little room?
Or is your calendar jam packed with meetings, events and to-do lists?
Of those things, how many of them are what you want? Or are they things you’re continuing to give time, energy and money to out of obligation.
Finally, how many of those obligations are to your own detriment?
I see this, All The Time.
Nearly every client, new and long term, have the same affliction. Continuing to do what they’ve always done because it’s familiar. Even when it makes them uncomfortable. Even when they are dissatisfied. Even when they know they aren’t getting any benefit from it.
We have three currencies
I believe we have three currencies. Time, energy and money.
If something is costing you any of these and creating a deficit without a return on investment, then what you are creating is not only debt, but also resentment, disappointment, and low vibe frequency level stuff.
I’ve done a lot of studying, reading and coaching in the couple decades. I’ve soaked up loads of knowledge, and a lot of ‘yeah that won’t work’ type of labelling for much of what many of us read and see.
I too was a skeptic.
When they told me to only do the stuff I loved, to have clear guidelines with clients, to not allow favours, to not settle – the only thing I thought was, but I’m self-employed, I’m going to have to go through some of the motions to make sure I “get the client” and “get paid” because goodness knows when the next client will show up.
Baby Heather didn’t know a whole lot when she first started this business running thing.
Baby Heather, burned out at least twice, and every month would feel deeply anxious over whether she’d be able to pay
Full disclosure, in the first three years of having her business it was never an issue. She replaced her corporate income easily within about 6 months. Additionally, within those 36 months, there were only 2 that she had to dip into the emergency fund to cover some things. Which is the point of having a runway emergency fund when you are a business owner.
Bonus tip: start saving a runway emergency fund now, if you ever think being a business owner is something you want to do with your life.
During one particular month, I had a repeat client that was no longer a fit. They hadn’t been a fit for a long time for a variety of reasons. This is not a judgement, it just is. Us coaches can’t be all things to all people, and the best thing we can do is bless and release when it comes to folks that we are out of alignment with.
The problem, however, was that I’d spent many months holding on, because of that damn $400. I mean, that’s a car payment, or a phone and internet bill, or groceries for a few weeks!
$400 is a LOT of money to say no to.
But, as that renewal period rolled around, I’d had enough. I simply could not hold space for this person any longer. I reflected on how terrible I felt after sessions, during sessions, and even before they started. This wasn’t an indication of them being a bad person, or having so many issues that my body couldn’t handle it. It was just my body’s way of saying ‘nope, no more, this isn’t a fit, move on.’
My body is my antenna, and always tunes into exactly what I need to do. When I ignore her, I suffer greatly.
For anyone who has worked with me, you know that I do my work through my body, and so I feel when things are ‘not quite right’ long before my mind makes a note and writes it down to take action.
Once the agreement was ended, it took about a week of very mixed emotions to move through my body. I was upset, and I was mostly disappointed in myself for not having strong or clear enough boundaries to protect myself and my business.
This was only the fourth person I’d ever had to release. The previous three were all clients who wanted psychic readings around topics that I was not comfortable speaking to or use my Spirit given gift with. This individual was a 1:1 coaching client. So, this was a big deal to me on a different level, this was going to change the future of how I handled everything, although I didn’t know it at the time.
Then, around week two, I had two new inquiries, one of which turned into a new mentorship client.
Around week three, I had several clients pay me in advance for multiple months.
In week four, I had two returning clients sign up for additional work after taking some time off.
All of this added up to being my first $10K month.
All because I’d released a client that was costing me in energy, time and money.
I’ve learned big lessons not letting clients run my business, and ultimately my life.
When I coach people in life or business, I always encourage and articulate how important it is to be clear on what you will and won’t tolerate from yourself first, because that becomes the foundation upon which you will build your boundaries and agreements with others.
When Baby Heather was starting her business, she said yes to everything, because she was trying to get hours and cash in hand. I dare say we likely all do this at some point in our lives. In some way.
From now on, I’m making 10K choices in body mind and spirit, as well as time, energy and money.
No more settling.
No more ignoring intuition.
No more making the ‘safe choice’ just in case.
Recognizing that the perceived price of something is never just what we see on paper. In my case that $400 also cost headaches, lost time on a personal level, and an inability to fully show up in other areas of my business because I was drained of what I needed to thrive.
For those of you who are curious, what happened to the 10K? It got divided into various accounts. Personal expenses for the household, car, food and so on, operating expenses, and emergency planning.
What 10K choice do you need to make today?
What needs to go, so that you can open yourself up to receive?