A Day of Ceremony
As I woke this morning, the air was cool. I could hear the rain just gently falling outside my window. It was dark still, but the energy was perfect. I decided to enjoy more time just laying there visualizing and manifesting. Also tuning in to whatever messages were necessary to receive. I saw ideas about my book, a Deer came to visit me and gave me very clear guidance about a piece of jewelry I possess, and I felt deeply rooted in my body. Then, a very specific moment in time came to me.
Three months ago on Christmas Day, my love and I were laying in bed bright and early enjoying our time together, and the calm pace of having no responsibilities that day. We were reflecting and sharing as we often do, and he told me he was proud of me. It was in relation to how I had worked on and taken care of an issue that I was going through because of some medication I was on. I’ll share that it was birth control, but my thoughts and feelings on how much it was destroying my life will come at another time, in another reflection. In short, it wasn’t good for my body, my mind or my spirit. It was turning me into a train wreck, with a splash of unstable insanity, and rage. I was difficult to be around, I was depressed and moody. I couldn’t self-regulate when I got upset about anything and I was not thinking very nice thoughts. This is no exaggeration, or embellishment. It, was, hell.
The day he told me he was proud of me was about two months after I had stopped taking it. He was proud of me for taking the action steps necessary to get my myself back to balance. He had acknowledged a whole new demeanour in me and I was moved to tears by his sharing of this with me. Our relationship had reached a whole new level of connection at that point, and continues to deepen daily. The rest of that conversation and day is ours and not for print, but the significance of it has shaped every moment since.
Today he celebrates a significant experience in his life two years ago. Again, not for me to print, but as I allow him the space and time he needs to do this, I reflect on my life two years ago. It came to me in my Facebook memories that on March 23rd, 2015 I had posted about how I had woken up and realized that everything I ever thought I wanted was nothing I wanted at all. I think of his ceremony today, and I think of mine right at the same time, and I can draw so many parallels and connections. It is moments like this that reaffirm what I know in my soul. It is moments like this, that the tears flow and cleanse me of all that no longer serves. It is moments like this, that remind me of my beautiful life path.
As I think back to that morning and realize that thought would propel me into soul alignment, I sit in overwhelm realizing how far I have come since then. The things I have changed, learned and realized. The space I have made in my life for all the blessings and magic that has arrived. The time I have spent focusing and working on me. So today, I celebrate. I celebrate who I am, the me I have re-discovered and I think I can finally say, I am proud of me too.